My Worst Nightmare


Charlotte Under Lights

Overnight Charlotte developed severe jaundice. Her bilirubin number was 22.4 which was the highest they had ever seen. She was rushed immediately and put under lights. They took her up to the NICU and she is still in the hospital. She will be there for several days. Before I left I went to visit her and her numbers came down to 15 and when I called at 8:30pm she was down even further to 13.9 which is good! 

I will call in a bit to get an update and go see her today. I am having trouble sleeping now because this is not how all this was supposed to end. She is supposed to be here at home with us. I know jaundice is common, I had 2 now 3 out of the 4 kids had it just not this severe. Had they not caught it the bilirubin could have gone to her brain and caused brain damage. Which is hy I am so freaked out because it happened so fast. 

We would appreciate prayers and good thoughts that she is able to come home sooner rather than later. I need to go try and sleep some. 




Man, the Hormones are Flyin!

Okay so you all understand, I am about to have my 4th child on December 6th. I have 2 adult children in Florida and my 14 month old son here with me as I write this one handed because he wants my other arm around him. If I try to remove it and try to type with both hands, he will grab said hand and put it back around him in no uncertain terms! So, honestly it is just easier to leave it there and type one handed rather than battle him!

So being 13.5 weeks pregnant is hard some times. My hormones are flying all around and I am so over emotional it is a good thing I do not have cable! All of those sad animal abuse commercials would have me in tears every 25 minutes or so! As it is I have had to hide somethings on Facebook because I know my friends are well meaning, but those stories of people leaving their kids in their cars and the kids die or the animals left in the hot cars can go one of two ways with me these days. I just sit there and cry or I get really, really angry with these stupid people. 

As I have mentioned in the beginning of this post I have 2 adult children, I never ever once forgot they were in the car even when they were babies! But then again we did not have cell phones back then and the Internet was just getting started so you could only access it from your house on dial up. 

I try really hard to not judge other people because I do not live their lives, but there was a story about how a woman left her new born in the car in her own driveway and the baby died because it was like over 100 degrees in the car. Are these people so self absorbed that they can not or do not want to care about another human being? I mean seriously, in HER OWN DRIVEWAY!!!! Think on that for a minute. I mean if her house looks anything like mine, it looks like a baby factory exploded! So, did she not see all the baby stuff in the house and go, oh yeah the kid is in the car?!? Apparently not. 

People are now talking about the left shoe trick, where you place your left shoe on the backseat by the car seat so you won’t forget the kid. The idea of this is that you won’t get out of the car and walk away without your shoe. How sad have we become when we are so into our own things, phones,lives that we can not remember our children are in the backseat without putting our shoe back there? I mean come on people, put the phones down for five minutes and pay attention!!! 

It totally saddens me that we have become a society that forgets our own children in hot cars and they die. I really think that there needs to be some kind of criminal action here. Of course if there are medical reasons, then do not take your kids with you if you can help it until they are older. I just get tired of crying about all these babies that are dying because their parents can not take the time to put the damn phones down. Don’t even get me started on the animals. 

I have actually broken a lady’s window to rescue her dog when I lived in Florida. I waited for her and told her I was the one that did it and why. I also told her to call the cops if she wanted. It was 95 degrees outside and her car had red interior and she left the window cracked maybe an inch. Her dog would have died had I not done what I did. I would do it again in a heart beat. She was not happy about the broken window but at least she did not come back out to a dead dog either. Okay, that is enough from me because honestly I would rant about this all day! 



With all my kids, I never ever had any issues eating. Until now. Which is really sad for me because well, I love to eat! I will go to the kitchen and see something that looks really good, so I will start to make it (reheat it, whatever) and by the time I get it made and sit down with it, nope can’t eat. Now my son Jeff thinks he hit the jackpot all the time because he will gladly eat what I don’t. Well, at least it does not go to waste. 

All I want to be able to do is to eat something almost anything without getting sick or feeling like I am going to be sick. Seriously. I am so tired. I got to eat just enough to take my antibiotic so I would not get sick from that at least. I will try again later. I have a Lunchable and a REV wrap that I can eat. Oh yeah and a TV dinner that I might be able to eat when my stomach settles in a bit. 

Discussing all this with my friends on Facebook and they are all saying the same thing, ‘ OMG you are having a GIRL!!’. Now I am not sure of all that, but I have heard that if your pregnancy is totally different from the one before it you will be having the opposite of what you had. Since I had a boy, by this reasoning I should be having a girl this time. However, there is one thing I learned over the years, ALL pregnancies are different! All I know right now is that I am so tired and over emotional all the time. 

One of the good things is that my new migraine medicine is actually working. It did take 3 days but for once I woke up this morning almost totally headache free! First time in almost a month that has happened, so I am happy and will definitely take that!

However, with Jeff whining at me about everything I think I might just get that headache back real soon! Is it nap time yet?!? Cause I need one and so does he!! Well, this binkie hunter has to go find the binkie he put somewhere…